Matthew 9:36 =  

“He had compassion on them because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” 

“When he looked out over the crowds, his heart broke. So confused and aimless they were, like sheep with no shepherd. “What a huge harvest!” He said to his disciples. “How few workers! On your knees and pray for the harvest hands.” (The Message) 

One of my favorite Saturday afternoon things to do during the Spring and Summer is to escape to the nearby park and just vegetate. Do not get me wrong, I like to mostly listen to the sounds of nature and to watch folks try their hand at fishing in the man-made pond which is usually freshly stocked just as the hint of Spring is beginning.  I often get a kick out of watching newly hatched ducks or geese waddling around the lake just before they take their very first dip in the water.  They are helpless and they are seemingly without someone to lead them; that is until Momma squawks that familiar sound that tells that little one to get themselves back in line so as not wonder off.   

All too often, we find ourselves on that path of self-discovery and control.  We think that we got all the answers and can make it just fine without an “adult” assuring us or comforting us to get back in line.   

Ever since I can remember, and for no apparent reason, I found myself being harassed and bullied.  On more than one occasion, the thought of suicide crept into my mind and found a quick exit, too.  There was a whole lot going on at home that I was afraid to talk to anyone about and I always felt as if the guys who were teasing and bullying me with their harsh remarks at school somehow knew because their comments were always right on point.  I had no one to confide in or to talk to and I felt extremely helpless.  I was lost and clearly, I was harassed for different reasons no matter where I went.  My dad, who by the time I was in high school had been separated from my mom for several years and when I would visit him mostly after school, I was harassed to behave in a way that I really was not wanting to. When I was at home, my stepfather seemed to pick up on where my father left off and so I was once again forced to do things that clearly were not in my way of thinking or living.   

When I went to church, the folks who were sent to minister to me had great difficulty addressing the issue because they “did not have any children and didn’t understand.”  So, for several years, I was a misguided teenager who was lost and always lived a life of fear, and no one honestly knew this to be the case.  I tried to tell my mom, but she was so in love with her new husband that I felt like an afterthought even when she told me that she wished I wasn’t born.  I know that she said this in anger, but it stung deeply and painfully.   

As my life would continue, the right people eventually started to come into my life, and I was able to find my place.  Oddly enough and with a great deal of my own questioning, I was brought to the Lord and shown where He would eventually call me to serve Him.  Who was I that He would choose me and want to use me…but why, when, where, and how?  Even I knew that I was on the outskirts of what He was looking for.  I could never fit in to the mold of what He was looking for as a “fisher of men”.  I hated fishing and I do not like seafood, so we had a problem.  But then I was introduced to prayer and shown the way to look deep into myself and find what it was that was keeping me from stepping out of the margins, those areas where I felt helpless.  I was taken back to the Old Testament and to the very short look into the life of Jabez (1 Chron. 4:9-12), “bless me and enlarge my territory (border).  Jabez wanted to be liberated from the consequences of his birth, like I did, and he was relentless in his prayer to God in faith believing that one day God would hear and answer his prayer.  I cannot begin to tell you the number of times I (we) have become frustrated with waiting for God to answer my (our) prayers, to take me out of a bad situation and help me to see the truth waiting for me.  Sometimes the trust was already revealed to me amid that struggle, and I was just too stubborn to see what He was trying to show me. But doesn’t this speak to us all?   

Just a few days ago, I was reading leisurely a book by Henri Nouwen, “The Way of the Heart”, ‘The Spirituality of the Desert Fathers and Mothers’. The final paragraph of the book speaks well to our role as ministers in reaching those in the harvest and in the margins and beyond. 

“The prayer of the heart is indeed the way of the purity of heart that gives us eyes to see the reality of our existence. This purity of heart allows us to see more clearly, not only our own needy, distorted, and anxious self but also the caring face of our compassionate God.  When that vision remains clear and sharp, it will be possible to move into the midst of a tumultuous world with a heart at rest.  It is this restful heart that will attract those who are groping to find their way through life.  When we have found our rest in God, we can do nothing other than minister.  God’s rest will be visible wherever we go and whoever we meet.  And before we speak any words, the Spirit of God, praying in us, will, make his presence known and gather people into a new body, the body of Christ himself.” 

May the Spirit of Almighty God move and have His being in our lives today and always.  God bless you.